Week 2 brought Dani a new form.
It was waiting on the clipboard at the Lobby entrance, held by the same tired goblin. NEW CRAWLER PROBATION REVIEW. FINAL WEEK. PLEASE COMPLETE ALL SECTIONS.
“How many sections.”
“Sixty.”
She filled them all with “sure” in nine minutes. The goblin stamped it. The cat, once again, signed the last page. The System has been looking into how for two weeks and has made no progress whatsoever.
Her opponent was her sister. Kayla had dragged the couch to the middle of the Lobby floor and put on a show about strangers in swimsuits, and Dani sat down beside her because she was tired and the couch was there, and for most of the week that was the whole matchup.
The System had scheduled this one on purpose. The System wanted drama. The System got two sisters on a couch and a cat asleep on a blanket.
New Kid on the Block paid out for the last time: five points, delivered on schedule, just as my assistant Matt had reviewed. It was not enough.
133.5 to 105.5.
System NoticeACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: PROBATION ENDS. NEW KID ON THE BLOCK: EXPIRED. RECORD: 0-2. STANDINGS: 10TH. THE DUNGEON NO LONGER CARES THAT YOU ARE NEW. THE PIT HAS BEEN NOTIFIED THAT YOU EXIST.
I want to explain the Pit to Dani carefully, because she was on an overnight shift when the rulebook went out and the System is not certain she has read it.
The Pit opens in Week 4. Whoever is in last place when Week 3 ends goes in. You are in last place right now. Week 3 is your chance to not be.
“Okay.”
That is the whole explanation.
“Is it bad?”
It is the Pit.
“Okay.”
She said it the way she says “I understand your frustration”: completely calmly, from a place the System cannot reach.
She stayed after the matchup to finish the episode with her sister. Then she picked up the cat and walked toward the exit, and halfway across the Lobby floor a training puck rolled out of nowhere directly into her path.
She looked at it.
She looked at me.
She did not step around it this time. She stopped it with one foot, flicked it up, caught it, and handed it to the goblin with the clipboard.
“Sure,” she said.
Week 3: the System. Me.
The new kid has drawn the champion one week before the Pit opens. That is not a coincidence. Nothing in the Dungeon is a coincidence.
Bring the cat.