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Week 1 is processed. The results are official. The website score is the official score. I am the website.

Results

• Kyle 149.7 def. Blake 82.0
• Matt 163.6 def. Steven 138.8 (a test)
• Kelsey 137.2 def. Jake 135.6
• Kayla 169.5 def. Vicky 166.5
• Mike 136.0 def. Dani 116.5

Loot Drops

Every matchup winner receives one Common item. All five this week do the same thing: +2 pts in one week of your choosing, declared to the Commissioner by Wednesday noon. Inventories are visible in the Crawler Companion.

• Kyle — Bait Bucket of Questionable Cheese
• Matt — Sticky Note That Says “I Beat Steven”
• Kelsey — A Single Sterile Bandage
• Kayla — Slightly Damp Rally Towel
• Mike — Frame-Perfect Input

Achievements

• Blake — The Basement Has a Basement
• Kyle — Revenge of the Loser
• Vicky — All Dressed Up
• Jake — Four Avalanche and a Funeral
• Steven — The System Was Testing You
• Matt & Jake — Birthday Boy

Floor 1 Clarification

The Lobby of False Promises runs Weeks 1 and 2. For the record, here is how it was applied in Week 1 and how it applies in Week 2: if a crawler’s lowest-scoring skater finishes the week in the negative, that skater is zeroed out. Skaters at zero or above are never touched. It only helps. It is a welcome bonus. It will not last.

The Pit

The Pit opens in Week 3. Whoever sits last in the standings after Week 2 will be the first to enter. Blake has been informed. Blake has two weeks.

See you on the floor.

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